Forgiveness and second chances are not the same thing. But a lot of times we confuse the two. Sometimes in life, our friends, family, or lovers will do things to us. Things that may offend us, hurt us, and even reshape our relationship and trust with that person for the worse. And over time, whether they’ve apologized a million times or you’re just over the situation and are finally ready to move on with your life,…you forgive them. The beautiful thing about forgiveness, is that it frees you from the situation and takes that heavy load of anger and disappointment off of your back. However forgiveness DOES not mean that the same person can come into your life the same way they did before.
See, that particular person has already shown you what they are capable of doing. They’ve already proven to you once that they are capable of bringing you pain and uneasiness. So why would you wholeheartedly accept a person like that back into your life again?
Forgiving them for their actions is the right thing to do, but that forgiveness does not warrant the right for a second chance to hurt you again. As you think about your future with that person, you have to do so with reservations. You have to act with your mind, not your heart and guard yourself towards that person. Why? Well you may not see it just yet, but what you are doing is sending that person the message that there will never be any real repercussions for their actions. In their mind, you’re saying “I may give you a little pat on the hand or take a little space from you…but no matter what you do in the end, it will always be okay.” And as soon as the opportunity arises to mess up, they will take it..Because they know another opportunity to win back your friendship or affection will be awaiting for them soon enough. And you’ll see that those “second chances” will soon become third, fourth, and fifth chances. And each chance that you give will hurt you more and more not only because of the pain that person caused you, but because you know better.
So as you’re forgiving those that have wronged you, remember that you are smarter now. You are wiser and you won’t allow anyone to hurt you twice. No matter how hard it may be, find the strength to act with your MIND that way in the end your HEART will be protected. Remember, fooled you once, shame on them…Fool you twice, shame on you. But little do they know, you’ll never be fooled again. Because with you, one times the charm.