Sometimes, I want to let anger win. I want to let hurt win. I went to let pride win. I don’t want to put on my usual smile and say “it’s okay”. Sometimes I get SO wrapped up in what I am feeling at that very moment and I want to stay there. Because when I do, I feel vindicated. Because for the moment, angers feels good. It feels so much better than being vulnerable and dealing with the real issue. Oddly, It feels like I’ve won a war within myself. But there’s always a voice in the back of my head. A little nudge from my better conscious reminding me of what I already know deep down. The voice telling me to do the right thing and to surrender my anger and be the bigger person. I know that voice is God. I know it’s his teachings that my parents instilled in me my whole life. I know it’s my heart talking to me. But sometimes, I don’t care. Sometimes I just want to shut it out. And I want to sit in the anger and unleash it to people and situations that have hurt me and left me misunderstood. I want to take out the pain I feel and thrust it back on life. But no matter how hard I try, something won’t let me do it…Something won’t let you do it. Why? Because you are one of the chosen ones.
You were chosen to be hurt by others. You were chosen to feel disloyalty from those you care about. You were chosen to face hardships. You were chosen to face trials. You were chosen to experience all of these things because God has chosen YOU to do something great in this life. And you have to go through this to get there. He has chosen you to do something that you can’t even see or realize yet. And everything you are feeling and all of these experiences you are feeling are sharpening you for that blessing. The hurt and anger that you feel is just a temporary byproduct of something greater. Trust me when I say, this ALL has a purpose. I know you’re looking at what’s going on in your life and you’re wondering, “Why me?”. “What have I done so wrong to deserve this?”. I know you’re looking at life and you’re tired..tired of pretending that you aren’t angry, upset, and hurt at the hurdles life keeps throwing at you. But you can’t sit in those negative emotions. You can’t let darkness defeat your light. You can’t forget that you were chosen. And when God chooses you, he’s choosing you because he knows what you’re capable of. He also knows people. He knows people will do things, people will say things…and sometimes, it will come from the people you love the most. But he knows you are stronger than them and you are stronger than any situation you are currently facing. By allowing yourself to stay trapped in your bitterness, you are losing. Losing your happiness, Losing your battle, and losing a part of you. You have to decide that you don’t want to be a victim anymore. You have to decide that you are going to choose happiness, even when people try to steal it from you. You have to decide to let go… to let go of the wrong that has been done to you and the situations that are keeping you in bondage. You have to realize that you were chosen, accept it, and wait on the blessing that will come from it.
A friend once told me that “God gives his toughest battles, to his strongest warriors.” As your fighting your battle, have peace in knowing that you were chosen. And the chosen ones, never loose.