I’ve observed something that I see almost everyday. A lot of women complain that chivalry is dead. And I’ll admit, it’s definitely lacking in this day and age. Personally, however, I don’t think it’s dead…I think it’s conditional. It’s become a thing that a lot of guys showcase when they feel a girl is worthy of it. When a guy is trying to impress a girl or make himself look good, he remembers to open every door, pull out every chair, and lift every heavy item. But what about her over there? The girl that you’re not interested in…does she get the same treatment? It seems that being chivalrous has become an exclusive privilege instead of a common act of courtesy. It’s become almost an exclusive treatment that only a few get to experience. So much so, that it’s something that’s bragged about as a good sign that a guy is interested. And these special ladies feel special when they get this treatment and might bask in the fact they’re being treated in a way that’s different from others girls. But think about it. Doesn’t it sound strange that being a gentleman is seen as an exception, rather than the rule? If he’s ability to be a gentleman is only contingent on who has his attention at the moment, that means it’s not genuine…and because it’s not genuine, it won’t last. So when you stop impressing him, his chivalry will stop tailoring to you as well. Newsflash ladies and gentleman, chivalry should apply to EVERY woman, no matter what. Ladies, you want a guy that takes delight in being a gentleman. Take notice of the man that doesn’t have to be reminded to do the little things like giving up his seat for the lady that standing, or walks on the side of the street closest to the road. Take note of the guy that’s not just chivalrous to you, but to every woman! Think about it, guys…Wouldn’t you want someone to do that for your mom or sister? Help break this new trend that encourages the idea that good manners have to be “earned” rather than expected. Break the look of surprisement that women get when a man randomly extends acts of kindness. That way instead of a man being seen as “thirsty” for his acts, he will be recognized with respect for doing what he should do. Not to say that women are not capable of doing things for themselves…we most certainly are. But putting chivalry back in our society is one of the first steps in reestablishing healthy relationships between men and women in our society. It’s a minor step in putting the art of pursuit back in the hands of the man.
So men, my challenge to you is to open the doors, pull out chairs, and be as chivalrous as possible to every and any woman that comes your way. Ladies, my challenge to you is to demand it. When you set expectations for yourself and the treatment that you deserve, nine times out ten, men will respect it and follow suit. In fact, although some may never admit it, it makes them like you more. I mean, who wouldn’t be attracted to a woman that wants the best?
Give it a try. And together lets bring back a tradition that never should’ve left.