Post #10: The Reason Behind A Parent’s Madness

I grew up in a strict a household…very strict. I am pretty sure if you look up strict in the dictionary, you’d see my parents picture. I couldn’t hang out with friends late (if at all), parties were out of the question, and anything that didn’t start and end with school or church was irrelevant. Not only were they strict, they were hard on me…and being the oldest of three girls didn’t help my case much. “Why wasn’t the 99 a 100?” “Why aren’t you doing something more productive with your free time?”…I hated it. It even hurt at times. Mainly because I didn’t understand, nor was I mature enough to accept it.
Some parents may never explicitly say this, but their actions will say it all. It wasn’t until I got older, that I was able to see the reason behind a parent’s madness, which is simply: they want us to be better than them. When our parents see us, they see our potential, even if we don’t see it in ourselves yet. They want us to win so bad, that they are willing to say what we need to hear rather than what we want to hear. They want us to do everything that they couldn’t do, didn’t do, and we’re scared to do. It’s like the game of basketball. For every shot in the game they missed, they want us to not only rebound, but slam dunk. So they prevent anything that will keep us from doing so. They are willing to give us tough love, because in the end they know it will be worth it when we end up being the best player on the court. Even if it kills them to say no, they will because they see what we can’t. So they’ll let us kick, scream, and even hate them as they coach us in this game called life. They don’t want our scoreboard to be even with theirs…They want us to win.
So I had to start hearing my parents differently. When they would ask about the friends I kept around me, instead of thinking they wanted to keep me from my friends, I had to hear it as “We want you to be around the best company possible, so that they can influence you to be better”. When they asked why I didn’t do better in school instead of thinking they weren’t proud of my success, I had to hear it as “We want you to have the brightest future possible”.
I had to train myself to realize that my parents critique is their way of showing me that they were on my side. Their no was just their way of saying yes to making me a winner, even when I was okay with taking second and third. They didn’t just want me in the game, they wanted me ahead of the game. I am not a parent, but now that I am older, I can finally understand the passion they had for me and my sisters. Like most, we didn’t always appreciate the fact that we grew up with one of the best coaches in the league, free of charge. They just wanted to see us win. Thanks to them, we’re going to be champions.
—–LifeOnLOC
Post #10

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