Post #9: Why He Chose You Second

Have you ever been labeled the “wifey type”? Everybody tells you you’re the type of girl you marry. Why wouldn’t they? You’re beautiful, you’re smart, you’re charismatic…the epitome of the “type of girl you bring home to meet your mom”. All this going for you and yet, guys still pick you second.

We’re in a generation where guys will have feelings for a great girl, care about her, heck, even love her, but will still knowingly put her to the side. Why? Because you show him exactly who he is. When he sees you and all that you have to offer, it’s a constant reminder to him of what he lacks. The insecurities and vulnerability that no one sees deep inside him, are put to the forefront and that makes him run. In you he sees everything he should be and he’s just not there yet. He sees your worth and what you bring to the table, and he can’t measure up, and the thought of trying to do so scares him. His ego can’t take the thought of trying to give you what you deserve and failing. So instead of choosing you…the girl he needs, he chooses her…the girl he can handle. The one that won’t require him to be the gentleman he needs to be. He can show his flaws and shortcomings to her with no shame, and she’ll take it. Because with her, average is enough. She doesn’t challenge him the way you do, so there’s no work. She pursues him. She gives him the kind of attention that you won’t. She satisfies him with sex and other baseless things that fulfill him for now, because the fulfillment you bring to him, is not comprehensible to him right now. She makes him feel physically great, but deep down he knows it all superficial and means nothing. He knows what he has in you is timeless. So instead of appreciating it, he falls into the trap of thinking you will be around forever. With that misconception in mind, he decides to focus on the fun, the now…rather than the true love, the lifetime. So he chooses her, and hopes that he can save you for when he can act like the husband you deserve. Reason being? Because he knows that she’s now, and you’re forever.
Yet, even in knowing that you’re the best choice, it still hurts. I mean, let’s be real, no one likes to lose. Sometimes it even makes you ask yourself: What’s the point in carrying myself with respect and exuding my best, when men don’t appreciate it? Well luckily, you aren’t doing it for men, you’re doing it for you!
See, You can tell the difference between a boy and a man by the woman he keeps on his arm. Therefore, the fact that he can choose a woman of less quality, should already tell you that he’s not for you. If he’s not willing to put in the work to be with you, he won’t be willing to put in the work to stay with you. You don’t want a man that wants what’s easy, you want a man that wants what’s worth it. The women who are worth it like you, don’t take second place. Women like you don’t get put on a shelf and wait till the man is ready. Instead women like you make men regret the fact that you were the one that got away. You deserve a man that will put you first, and believe me, there IS a man that will put you first. So I know taking second hurts for the moment, but remember that God always sees us through our toughest battles, and he’s got one heck of a blessing waiting on you. Yes it’s frustrating and yes it hurts, but remember that your Boaz is coming. Just do me a favor, and be patient while God prepares him for you . ❤️

—-Post #9

2 thoughts on “Post #9: Why He Chose You Second

  1. This was truly a great read. I completely agree with this post. I wish it didn’t hurt us so bad when these things happen. A great man will always show up sooner or later.

    Thank you for this post!

    L.A. ❤



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